Five Lessons from My 2-Week Social Media Detox
It was a dreary Tuesday morning in October, but it was warm inside as I sipped a beloved matcha latte with my best guys.
Of course I posted about it on social.
Because if it happens and you don’t share it on a platform, did it really happen?
Within a few minutes, this sweet cherished “private” moment was seen by thousands.
And, that isn’t the scariest part.
A few minutes after pressing send, when I started seeing those coveted “likes” rolling in, I noticed that I was feeling euphoric.
Like I had just had 5 matcha lattes, high!
I quickly learned from Sunlight Recovery that “social media algorithms are designed to keep us engaged and coming back for more. They do this by triggering the release of dopamine, a chemical in our brains that makes us feel good. Dopamine is released when we receive likes, comments and other forms of validation on social media. This can lead to addiction as our brains become accustomed to this flood of dopamine and experience withdrawal symptoms when we go without it.”
I was time to take a break from the social media. ALL OF IT!
I had planned a two-week vacation from work and had already decided there would be no computers or work email (so like a normal vacation circa 2010). And now, here I was, not just saying goodbye to LinkedIn, but also taking a break from Instagram.
Was it possible? Could I do it?
I had my doubts, but am nothing if not disciplined.
On, November 10th, 2023, I went radio silent from all social media and work email for two whole weeks (actually 2 weeks and a day, but who is counting? ME).
Here is what I learned:
Being on social media elevates your daytime heart rate and messes with your heart rate variability (HRV).
Don’t believe me…purchase an Oura ring and see what happens when you go off social for two weeks. My HRV was regularly in the teens when I was on LI and IG, and once I hopped off, it went back to the 20s and 30s. If you aren’t familiar with HRV, it is an indicator frequently used to monitor stress. Everyone’s baseline is different, but generally the lower the score, the higher the stress.
So, if you are a stress ball like me, stepping away from social media may help you relax.
Your people (you know, the three dimensional ones?) need you and deserve more of your time than they get.
My partner loves me and I love him too. I’m blessed. And yet lately, much of my life has been spent responding to people who comment on my posts—hoping they feel seen and heard. Don’t get me wrong, I love connecting with people over social and have made some fabulous friends that way.
However, my partner was rarely being seen or heard.
The craziest thing happened when I kicked social for two weeks…My marriage began flourishing. We were sharing long enjoyable meals and listening to one another (without phones on the table).
Talking, laughing, enjoying the company of actual humans is highly underrated. I remember now!
Nature is an awesome free way to reduce anxiety, and it is all around us. Look up!
On my two week vacation, I learned about forest bathing or Shinrin Yoku, the practice of stopping to observe the natural beauty that surrounds us as we attempt to “see the forest through the trees.” Trees release phytoncides which literally strengthen our immune systems and help us fight disease.
Forest bathing has been extensively studied and here are some of the benefits:
It helps regulate blood pressure (Wen et al., 2019).
The practice can activate the parasympathetic nervous system which our body uses to rest and digest (Farrow & Washburn, 2019).
Forest bathing can increase natural killer cells, which protect against diseases like cancer (Yu et al., 2017).
Movement of all kinds happens when you put down your devices (I even lost weight):
That’s right! When you aren’t dreamscrolling or doomscrolling, you need things to do. I spent a lot of time walking, cleaning, dancing, strength training, and doing yoga. I even lost a few pounds.
Because believe it or not, social media is a BIG time suck. We know this to be true, and ignore this knowledge. The same way we know broccoli is healthier than ice cream and consistently choose the Häagen Dazs.
My average daily screen time went down by over 80% the first week and by an additional 37% the second week. Now granted, a lot of that time was spent on work email. But still, I marvel at my wasted time. Now I prefer using my phone to play music and dance around the living room, and mainly use my laptop for social media.
We are more likely to boost endorphins by moving than by trolling.
I felt more periods of prolonged joy during my social media detox.
Let’s be honest (at least with ourselves) looking at social media rarely leads to feeling better about our lives.
No matter how amazingly we gate our connections or how diligent we are in only liking pictures of matcha lattes and chihuahuas, the algorithms will eventually steer us towards a shiny skinny celebrity living out a storybook romance, or towards a $15,000 Chanel bag, we neither can afford nor need (maybe this just happens to me?).
Click bait rarely leads to contentment.
And then, there is that dreaded “needy user algorithm.” The first two days without social left me feeling twitchy and off thanks to the addictive pattern I was breaking. After that, I felt free as a bird (which was better than feeling high as a kite from all of that social induced dopamine).
To sum up my detox experience, I will quote American treasure, Gloria Gaynor, “At first I was afraid, I was petrified. Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side. But then I spent so many nights just thinking how you did me wrong and I grew strong and I learned how to get along.”
This is not a farewell speech to my beloved social media. It is merely intended to create awareness for the life that can exist for us if we dare to stop scrolling and look up from our phones once in a while.
Try a social detox and let me know what surprises you the most!
Oh, and if the social media addiction commentary from Sunlight Recovery didn’t scare you, be sure to read “Wellness” by Nathan Hill, and let me know what you think after reading the section “The Needy Users-A Drama in Seven Algorithms.
The book is sure to do the trick!